Driving to work today I got caught in every single traffic light all the way up from where I live to where I work – a stretch of about 8 miles, crossing about a hundred traffic lights. OK, not a hundred. Maybe 17 or so, but when they all turn red just as you inch up to them they feel like a hundred by the time you’ve reached your destination.
As I was stuck in traffic, I looked around me. I had time to think so I began to notice how we go into alone mode in cars and try to pretend that the other drivers do not exist. Everyone knows that they are in traffic, knows that every car around them has a driver and maybe some passengers, and knows that this is not the correct forum for pleasant conversations across glass windows. We steadfastly look in front of us, talk to our passengers, and think our own thoughts.
This morning I made it a point to look at the faces behind the wheels of every car I stopped next to at traffic lights. I didn’t stare or make eye contact, I just glanced to see what they were doing.
The whole of humanity drove past, what richness of diversity we live with in Miami.
I spotted several ladies putting on their makeup, a couple of guys eating their breakfast, and many others drumming their fingers on the steering wheel as they (probably) listened to music. One or two were smiling to themselves, one looked angry, and there was the usual array of others talking loudly on their phones.
It occurred to me that this would be the exact same scenario in morning rush traffic anywhere in the world. Humanity connected by the misery of rush hour traffic. In countries where using phones is illegal while driving, there might be more people drumming their fingers to music or listening to the news. Those might also be the countries where more people catch public transport or car pool. All of us caught in the boredom of getting ourselves to work in the mornings.
As I was in this reverie, I too had the radio on. They played a song by Sia. Such a strong beautiful voice, and an incredible sense of rhythm and timing, I’m a huge fan, and I love her shoes. Sia never shows her face, her public do not know what she looks like. She could be in the car next to me at the traffic light and I would never know it’s her. It’s to protect her privacy, it’s to allow her to go about her daily life without being hounded by people like me. I respect that. It made me think about the energy of our faces.
Whether we like our faces or not, with or without makeup, it is our face that we present to the world. Our image is more than just our face, it includes our fashion style, our hair, our persona at large. But in essence, it is our face that people react to and interact with. It is our eyes that tell stories, and our mouths that betray our thoughts, even when closed. There are very few of us who can attain a true poker face, and most of us don’t trust people whose faces we can’t read.
It made me remember a strange conversation I once had with a hairdresser. We were discussing faces, and he likes to think of everyone as having four faces: The face you see, the face others see, the face you think others see, and the face you really are. Profound garbage or deep philosophy? Well, either way it helped to pass the time while my hair was being cut, and exploring the meaning of faces helped to pass the time in rush hour traffic this morning.
photo by SKhuri | grackles and traffic lights | Miami, FL, USA